Tag Archives: crisis

NHS Crisis: Now overstretched hospitals are referring patients to vets

NHS vet

Patients can also choose not to be neutered.

Rather than expose patients to 15 hour waits in beleaguered A&E units, a NHS whistle-blower has revealed that some overstretched hospitals have been referring patients to veterinary practices for more immediate treatment.

Even more embarrassing for the NHS, internal surveys of customer satisfaction have shown that patients would rather return to the vet for further treatment rather than their local hospital.  Continue reading

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Developers look to nature to solve London’s housing crisis with the ‘Escar-Go’

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With London house prices getting beyond the reach of ordinary people, and affordable properties getting smaller and smaller, one developer has started putting a new range of properties on the market.

Modelled on a snail’s shell, the developer says their new ‘All-In-One Portable Studio Apartment’, named the Escar-Go, has everything a young aspiring professional could need and the homes fit in well with the environment, providing you spend the night in other people’s gardens.

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Council funding crisis: London being closed to save money

houses-of-parliament

Some buildings are better when they’re empty

The government has arrived at a radical solution to alleviate the council funding crisis. When research confirmed that three out of five councils nationwide will have no money whatsoever by 2015 the decision was made to close London and redistribute its budget across the UK. Continue reading

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Prescription self-help books blamed for 4-hour wait at library

library

Queuing for Dummies (by Doctor Evans)

The latest attempt by GPs to avoid doing any work is causing massive delays at local libraries.

With the A&E department at Dunstable hospital already full to capacity, local quack Dr Evans is urging would-be patients to ‘read a book’, instead of bothering a proper health professional.

“It’s not my fault people get ill outside office hours”, suggested Evans. “It would help me enormously if they would only get sick between 10.30am and 3.30 pm, or before 1pm on a Wednesday.

“But while I sympathise with those who say I spend all my time on the golf course, they might first consider ‘would I be better off in the library?'”

Thanks to a new national initiative, Doctor Evans can now prescribe people ‘self-help’ books which are available from all good librarians. “For a simple £7.85 prescription, they can pick up something I heartily recommend”, said Evans. “Preferably something quite long, that will take ages to finish.”
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Filed under Around Harold, Dr. Evans' Casebook, News