Tag Archives: speed limit

Villagers claim ’11 speed limits is too many’

road signs

PC Flegg claims series of limits gave a ‘gentle transition to safety’. Cllr Ronsson, however, was furious. “I lost my licence in the space of just 20 yards: 45 in a 40, 44 in a 39, 43 in a 38…what makes it worse was she was just holding a hair dryer.’

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Admin error sees murder rates soar

speed copyMurder rates in the village of Harold have risen dramatically over the last 3 weeks following an admin error on a speed awareness sign. The sign, which was ordered by a now sacked JSA claimant, tells drivers to ‘kill a child, not your speed’, but a reduction in funding means it would now be too expensive to replace.

Recent local government cuts has meant replacing the sign is out of the question. The local council have tried to use Tip-ex to amend the sign to read ‘kill your speed, not a child’, but have found parents too eager to scratch it off.

Councillor Ronsson, ex-father of three, explained the difficulties the council were having. “The people of Harold are a very moral bunch, so when they see Tip-ex on a sign they immediately clear the graffiti off. Unfortunately they respect authority as well, so did exactly what the sign says, some a little too keenly.”
Read more here…

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Filed under Around Harold, News, Politics