Celebrity couple Elton John and David Furnish are not named in the Panama Papers, putting to rest internet rumours that their affairs were not in order.
Both John and husband Furnish were trending on Twitter, leading to speculation they were trying to cover up secretive transactions in Panama. But it now seems it was a simple misunderstanding leaving many people embarrassed at how they jumped to conclusions.
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Shirtless blokes, this is not what you look like
The village council has passed a new law ordering men to cover-up when mooching around during the heatwave on account of no one wanting to be confronted by shirtless horror while innocently trying to do a little shopping.
“The High Street isn’t the beach,” said Mayor Rufus D. Jackson. “And the garden of the Squirrel Lickers is not the gym. Villagers have the right to be about their business without having moobs, scrawn, fur, horrible tattoos, spots, and distressing combinations of all five shoved in their faces with all the force and grotesqueness of Katie Hopkins’ opinion on migrants crossing the Med.” Continue reading
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Filed under Around Harold, Weather
Theresa May’s attempts to organise a piss up in a brewery has entered its four year, but still looks some way off actually happening.
The piss up was supposed to celebrate her party’s election success in 2010. “I didn’t want anything too complicated, just a few drinks in a place where drink would be readily available,” the prime minister explained.
However the apparently simple task got off to a bad start when May appointed Gordon Brown to arrange the party.
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