Customers ‘left stunned’ – unlike the animals.
A veterinary surgery that claims to follow halal practices has drawn protests in the village of Harold.
Following guidelines for animal welfare dictated by an angel some 1,400 years ago, the Jamuh Haariat practice treats a range of ailments using only a sharp knife.
“While we could use an anaesthetic, that isn’t specifically mentioned in the Quran”, explained Dr Haariat. “That either means they weren’t invented then, or more likely, Allah forbids them.”
This sheep was stunned shortly before it was humanely run over.
In response to the uproar surrounding unmarked Halal meat, supermarkets have pledged to offer consumers much more choice in the way animals are killed.
Sifting through the meat aisle of her local Tesco, Harold resident Pippa Delaney welcomed the move.
“It’s so much better, now we’re properly and sometimes graphically informed”, she insisted. “Let’s see: cricket bat with a nail in it…bolt gun in the face…liver failure…ooh! This one sounds delicious AND guilt-free: ‘hit by a meteorite’. I bet that makes it tender as well.”
Filed under Culture, Food, News
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