Tag Archives: licence

Rhinos queuing up to apply for hunter goring licence

rhinos

Rhinos practice the goring position.

A group of rhinos has successfully pooled its resources in order to purchase a hunter goring licence.

The thick-skinned creatures-of-habit have struggled to adapt to the modern world, and tend to blunder about destroying the environment without so much as an apology. ‘That’s why we want to gore one of the buggers’, explained a rhino.

Intitially the rhinos struggled to collect a turnip and the carcass of a wildebeest, before adding a burst armadillo a couple of days later.

But by pulling together, they soon managed to add a small hippo and a fairly sizeable rock, as well as a tanker containing 43,000 litres of gasoline which just tipped them over their financial target.
Continue reading

Comments Off on Rhinos queuing up to apply for hunter goring licence

Filed under Nature, Sport

New rules for middle-lane hoggers and tailgaters may be used to stop u-turns in Westminster

Miliband was asked to point left for photographers

Miliband was asked to point left for photographers

With motorway police getting new powers to issue on-the-spot fines and penalty points for offences such as middle-lane hogging, police in the Westminster have asked for similar powers to reduce the increasing amount of careless manoeuvres such as u-turns.

The latest person found to be caught making unexpected moves is Ed Miliband, who has been witnessed committing a number of dangerous u-turns around his financial policy. Under the proposed plans, this would have resulted in a £60 fine and three points.
Continue reading

Comments Off on New rules for middle-lane hoggers and tailgaters may be used to stop u-turns in Westminster

Filed under News, Politics, Travel