Tag Archives: Andrew Lloyd Webber

Andrew Lloyd Webber writes show about ‘sticking it to The Man’: Music is dead

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Anarchy in the UK brought to you by Baron Lloyd-Webber of Sydmonton and Baron Fellowes of West Stafford

Satan’s little goblin of plagiarism and inanity, Andrew Lloyd-Webber, has finally succeeded in killing music by writing a musical, School of Rock, about the glory of rock and roll with fellow desiccated hulk, the purveyor of cliché and wet dream fodder for the sort of person who’ll  campaign to preserve an old church and to deny entry to the UK to children fleeing a war zone with equal vigor that is Julian Fellowes.  Continue reading

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Family hospitalised as infectious yawn loop takes hold during ‘Les Miserables’.

yawning-childThe Nolan family from Harold are recovering in Dunstable General Infirmary today after a quiet evening in front of the telly almost turned to tragedy. Continue reading

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Filed under Around Harold, Badgers, Dr. Evans' Casebook, Health, idiots, Medicine, News

New Lloyd Webber superhero appears wherever inequality is threatened

andrew lloyd webber

“… whenever wealth or privilege are threatened”

The government defeat in the House of Lords has revealed a humble tunesmith’s status as international superhero, fearlessly parachuting in to vote whenever wealth or privilege are threatened.

Born plain Andrew Lloyd Webber, Baron Lloyd-Webber of Sydmonton struggled to come up with the tricky third name that hadn’t already been used, after learning there were no Puccini operas with superheroes he could rip off.  Continue reading

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Filed under News, Politics

Benedict Cumberbatch the Musical opens in London

Benedict Cumberbatch is an ordained minister

It features the heart-rendering ballad Don’t Cry for Me, Martin Freeman

Benedict Cumberbatch the Musical has its première in the West End tonight setting what many are calling the biggest tourist and hen night trap since A Midsummer Night’s Sheeran.

“I’ve done Jesus, I’ve done Eva Peron, now it’s time to do a true legend,” said composer Andrew Lloyd Webber. “Audiences are going to be swept along by the rags-to-riches story as just like Jean Valjean, Benedict grows up in Kensington, attends Harrow then both Manchester University and LAMDA. Finally with just all the contacts he’s made plus both his parents being actors he somehow manages to break into show business. Remarkable.” Continue reading

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Filed under Showbusiness