Relief as migrants start heading south for the winter.


Who do you think you’re kidding?

European leaders have expressed their relief as hundreds of thousands of foreign migrants began the long trip south to their winter asylum seeking quarters.

Flocks of Syrians, Iraqis and lesser spotted Afghans have been observed flicking V formations at stony faced border officials as they try to find somewhere warm and welcoming to spend the winter months.

Professor Digby Heckling, lead scientist at Southampton University’s Centre for Watching Things said “The normally rich European lands have been unusually cold and hostile this year. What should be a time for rebuilding strength and vigour has been nothing short of arduous torture for these poor creatures”.

Migrants integrating seamlessly with their host country.

Meanwhile Spain, France and Italy have asked the UNHCR for extra supplies of Heinz beans, HP sauce and John Smiths bitter in readiness for a swarm of Common British Sun Seeker (chavvius pissheddium) recently seen flocking in the direction of the channel ports.

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