London’s tube train drivers are marking the tenth anniversary of the day London defiantly got moving again, by defiantly staying in bed.
With a paltry £2.5k bonus and a 2 percent payrise to top up their meagre £50k salary on offer, rail workers claimed it wasn’t enough to stop them treating their customers with utter contempt.
“It’s tradition”, said Terence Cockney, who is employed to sit down near a lever. “We always strike at Christmas, bank holidays or when it causes the most offence.”
Mr Cockney complained that while earning more than double the average wage to eat sandwiches in a front seat might seem a lot, the cost of living in London meant that it wasn’t.
“It’s expensive working in London, you have to factor in the cost of your season ticket, for starters”, he claimed. “Although we don’t, obviously: me and the missus get to ride the network for free.”
“And then there’s those taxis to pay for, when the tube drivers are on strike. No, that doesn’t affect me either; it’s just an example.”
Mr Cockney didn’t think it was selfish to hold commuters to ransom, particularly as some of them earn even more than he does.
“Even with all the perks, I’m still only earning around £40k a year more than a junior doctor. Isn’t that awful? Perhaps they could hold a minute’s silence.”