Following allegations over her behaviour in not allowing MPs a vote on Brexit, Theresa May has confirmed that she is exactly like a Tudor monarch in that she’s had six wives, and, as well an incurable sexually transmitted disease, also possesses a demented penchant for composing crap yet catchy songs upon a lute, and executing former BFFs. Continue reading
Tag Archives: Henry VIII
Painstaking research by Harold don, Professor Bethany Russell, has revealed that Henry VIII, famous for having six wives, was also a first class bricklayer who played an active part in the building of many of the great palaces attributed to him.
According to recently discovered papers, there was nothing he liked better after a hard day conducting the affairs of state, than to spend a couple of hours working on the intricate brick tracery of Hampton Court Palace with a trowel in his hand.
Historian Dan Cruickshank has denied ‘dumbing down’ in his new series, ‘A Nuddy History of Britain’.
“If we’ve learned anything from Game of Thrones it’s that people remember the naked bits”, he frothed. “The naked bits, and the violent and bloody deaths.”
Cruickshank hastily re-edited a pilot show for his new project, which explored complex family trees, socio-economics and the inherent political injustice of the day. Instead, the show now features writhing, sweating bodies, several gallons of baby oil and rubber masks that look a bit like famous royals.