Tag Archives: Range Rover

New BMW X7 will be tank

20140527-110625-39985340.jpgThe recently-announced BMW X7 will be a fully functioning, combat-ready tank, according to an update released by Norbert Reithofer, CEO of the German car makers.

Details have been sparse since the announcement at the end of March that BMW were to begin work on a new flagship addition to their range of X off-roaders, so this update has been welcomed by fans of unnecessarily large cars. Priced at around £5 million each the X7 will also be a real status symbol, with customers limited to the wealthiest of dickheads and some armed forces.

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Village Mayor blasts Madonna in lifeboat donation furore

MadonnaPop star Madonna was accused today of expecting the village of Harold to ‘roll out a red carpet and blast a 21-gun salute in her honour’.

The spat occurred after the 54-year-old self-publicist and her entourage arrived in a motorcade of black-windowed Range Rovers, demanding to see the fruits of the altruistic gesture she displayed during an accidental visit to Harold in 2006.

Harold’s Mayor, Rufus D Jackson, said that when Madonna had found herself in Harold after taking a wrong turning during the Confessions tour, she had been accosted by a fund-raiser for a Lifeboats flag day. Continue reading

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