Probably best if you just stay in the house for a while Ed
A bad week for Ed Miliband ended on another embarrassing note today as it emerged that he had accidentally voted for Ukip in his local council elections.
The Labour leader had already struggled with the cost of his weekly shop, the name of the Labour candidate in Swindon, and eating a bacon sandwich like a normal human being. Now it appears that he has also forgotten the name of his local councillor and, after taking a stab in the dark, succeeded in getting the wrong party entirely. Continue reading
Um bongo um bongo, they play them outside Tesco.
Harold’s leading ethnic percussionist has claimed his shop may not survive, following a withering attack by local politician Ron Ronsson.
Bongo Bongo Land has been selling slightly shoddy hand drums since 1993, when they took over the units previously occupied by failed Dawn’s Zulu Xylophones and the adjoining African airline agent, Fly Tse Tse.
With locals keen to add an international flavour to their conservatories and hallways, George Evans’ deer-hided instruments were once the perfect accompaniment to Indonesian face masks, native American dream catchers and ‘Welsh Drums’ made from a bin lid and half a brick.