Tag Archives: Buckingham Palace

Pensioners who can’t afford to turn on heating delighted by Buckingham Palace’s £389m refurbishment


“OMG! Best news evar!”

The oldest and most vulnerable in our society are happy that one of them, an elderly lady known only as Mrs E. Windsor is having her house refurbished at tax payers expense. Continue reading

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Man arrested at Buckingham Palace for using wrong knife


If you don’t know what it’s for, you’re probably scum.

The Metropolitan Police have confirmed that a man has been arrested for using the wrong knife during a meal at Buckingham Palace.

Security officers moved swiftly to detain the individual, when it became clear he had no idea which end of a posset knife was which.

“A 44 year-old man has been held for questioning, after showing his class during an official State Dinner”, declared Chief Inspector Mutton at a hastily convened press conference. “Our suspicions were first aroused when he fumbled his gizzard tweezers, and failed to inflate a quail in the correct manner with a set of game bellows.”
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