Paul Dacre: editor of the Daily Mail. We could add more but that first sentence seems damming enough.
Staff at the Daily Mail – think of the Minions from Despicable Me then imagine it being remade in Hell – are bouncing into work this morning ready for the start of Poppy Hunting Season which runs from now until 11th November during which they attack anyone in the public eye who isn’t wearing a poppy at all times.
Wear them or die. We give it five years before that’s a real law
The Daily Mail, an evil early post-war village fête where all the cakes taste like hate and the top prize in the raffle is a trip to throw stones at the Windrush as she docks in word form, is today demanding the death penalty for the three judges who ruled that MPs should vote on Brexit after they were photographed not wearing poppies. Continue reading
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Filed under Brexit
Wave this at the Border Force and it’s as good as a visa
Mindless drunken bellow of rage echoing out of a piss-stained alley at closing time in word form, the Sun, is demanding that the UK closes its borders to anyone who isn’t a small child wearing a poppy.
“Anyone who doesn’t wear a poppy AT ALL TIMES is not British enough to be part of our great society,” thundered the paper owned by a man who’s so patriotic he swapped nationalities for tax purposes. “This great country should only accept tots, little tiny tots wearing poppies looking photogenically bewildered as the clutch their teddies, teddies made in Britain wearing poppies, for comfort.” Continue reading
Sad poppy, slumped in despair, yesterday
Stupid friends you have on Facebook are persisting in sharing Britain First’s posts, despite it being obvious that the organisation is a bunch of Nazi fuckwits, it emerged today. The arrival of remembrance season has made your less intelligent acquaintances even more tiresome than usual, with many happy to share a photo of Hitler provided it has a poppy and a starving dog in the picture.
Hopes had been high that even the most disappointing of your friends would have realised by now that sharing these posts is the online equivalent of wearing your own faeces as a hat, but sadly the penny seems yet to drop.
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Filed under Politics, Social media
A man found battered to death on waste ground is believed to have been killed simply because he was not wearing a Remembrance Day poppy. His death is being treated by police as a ‘charity initiative that may have gone a little too far’.
Ironically, the victim, named locally as Roland Richardson, was himself a veteran of the Falklands conflict. Although he was not wearing a poppy on the day of his death, it is thought that this was simply because he had not transferred his poppy to his jacket when going out that morning.
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