passports | The Evening Haröld

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by malgor | March 22, 2018 · 9:25 pm

Gateshead passport printer De La Rue loses contract for ‘sounding a bit French’

Oops, wrong one. Well they all look the same, don’t they.

Comedy and Tragedy were blended together today in the Tory soup-maker to produce the finest ironic Brexit Smoothie yet.

Franco-Dutch firm Foux da fa fa et un homme qui s’appelle Lars have been awarded the contract to print the UK’s new non-EU passport, after Jacob Rees-Mogg said the existing Gateshead firm De La Rue ‘sounded a bit French’.

“The writing was on the wall,” he said. “Well, on a brass plate on the wall, anyway.”

Brexiteers’ heads have been exploding as they grapple between the desire to keep foreign hands off sovereign matters and the freedom to trade where we want. Continue reading →

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Filed under Brexit, Business, Europe

Tagged as De La Rue, france, Gateshead, Of The Street, passports, printing, UK sovereignty

by waylandsmithy | June 11, 2014 · 11:00 am

Passportless British family claim asylum in Disneyland

Family will flee to Universal Studios in future.

A family from Harold has spoken of their desperate journey to Disneyland, after their passports were processed a bit slowly.

With time running out fast for the Smiths, dad Michael feared they may be forced to seek holiday in Norfolk. He wasn’t prepared to subject his two children to such a fate.

“We’d done everything right”, claimed Michael. “There was a good 16 hours to go until the ferry left at the point when I filled in the passport application forms. Then I popped them on the mantelpiece for Linda to take to the post office. And yet somehow, they still haven’t bloody arrived.”
Continue reading →