The Grim Reaper has announced that his project for 2016 is to put together a truly remarkable band in the afterlife.
“I took Lemmy and then thought, hang on, this could be the start of something big so I carried on,” the anthropomorphic personification told us. “After Lemmy for bass I went huge for the front man and got Bowie and now there’s also Dale Griffin on drums and Glenn Frey on lead guitar.”
“A band this awesome needs a hugely charismatic person to introduce them and no one fits the bill like Alan Rickman.” Continue reading
Freedom of Robbie Williams has only been granted to a few fortunate households.
The city of Stoke-on-Trent has finally been released from its shackles, following the granting of the Freedom of Robbie Williams.
Stoke-on-Trent, which is technically a group of six manufactured boy towns, has suffered from Robbie Williams for two decades.
‘This is a blessed relief’ announced the smallest town with a grating voice, Tunstall. ‘That tattooed entertainer has been difficult to live down to. We might be a bit scruffy, short on talent and prone to nicking other people’s songs. But at least now, we don’t have to pretend to be interested in tone-deaf, middle-aged divorcees.’