Well maybe not this bad but still pretty damn ratty
Figures released today confirm that since 2010 the percentage of men who look like rats has increased dramatically along with significant rises in those who could best be described as ‘weaselly’ or ‘ferreties’. Continue reading
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This may be more lifelike than the original
With proposals for a Mrs Thatcher statue in Parliament Square rejected for fear of vandals, a Harold sculptor has submitted plans for a ready-vandalised version.
Sculptor Digby Burns is perhaps best known locally for his acting, having appeared in an early episode of Midsomer Murders [uncredited, man walking dog by lake] and of course, his career-defining series of TV ads for Dairylea Continue reading
“Look into my eyes, look into my eyes, the eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes, don’t look around my eyes, look into my eyes, you’re at war.”
Tony “I think most people who have dealt with me, think I’m a pretty straight sort of guy, and I am” Blair has found the perfect spot to go to ground as the chances of him being prosecuted for leading the UK into the Iraq War increase: the vast empty wastes of the Shard. Continue reading
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“I knew Jack Kennedy. Senator, you’re no Jack Kennedy.”
Theresa May has recalled the heady days of Mrs Thatcher bashing Johnnie Foreigner whilst helpfully improving her dire poll ratings, by deploying a taskforce to deal with the aftermath of the Grenfell Tower fire.
Just like Margaret Thatcher before her, Mrs May has sent in a taskforce to sort out problems resulting from a series of piss-poor risk assessments, in the hope that the public will revise their opinion of her. Doesn’t seem likely Continue reading
Look how much more down to earth she is than Trump. Although shortly after this picture was taken Lizard Philip shifted into his true shape and ate the two on the left.
The fireworks are mere farts with tiny sparks and the hot dogs sadness loaded with fried regrets and ‘I can’t believe this is happening’ sauce for many Americans today as they spend the 4th July wondering if ditching the Brits was worth it now it’s lead to President Donald Trump. Continue reading
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The Black Pig is now sixty-five per cent of the entire Royal Naval fleet.
In a post-Brexit attempt to have less friends than that weird kid from your primary school whose smell could make a statue vomit and had a plaster over one lens of his NHS glasses the government has announced that it will be enforcing control of UK fishing waters. Continue reading
“Stab her in the front or the back? Today or tomorrow?” Boris weighs up his options
Boris Johnson is the latest top Tory to feign concern for public sector staff as a screen for a leadership bid.
“Our fantastic nurses, firefighters, police, some others I can’t think of. I’ve got the notes here, somewhere.” he said, patting his pockets and acting the roguish Continue reading
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