‘Olympics is pants and we didn’t want to play anyway’ says Russia

211px-2016_Summer_Olympics_logo.svgHoofed out of the Olympics for fielding athletes with more drugs in them than the Wolf of Wall Street, Russia has said that it doesn’t care and that playing alone is “way so much cooler and more fun.”

Listlessly bouncing a tennis ball against a wall and trying to catch it one-handed Russia said that the Olympics were “rubbish” and that it didn’t want to compete against other countries because they’re all “gaylords and have fleas.”

With a long empty summer stretching ahead of it Russia says that it has loads of adventures planned that it didn’t want to share and that no one cares about stupid Rio and the thick Olympics. Then it refused to go in for its tea until its mum really shouted using its full name.

Comments Off on ‘Olympics is pants and we didn’t want to play anyway’ says Russia

Filed under Olympics

Comments are closed.