Desperate X-Factor lowers age limit to 3


If you want to succeed in showbiz, kid, you’ll need a whole new image. That Daily Mail sidebar of shame doesn’t fill itself.

Simon Cowell has defended lowering the X-Factor’s age limit to toddlers, denying it’s just an exploitative ratings grab.

“This decision has been made in order to create the best show,” Cowell said, with the air of a man flogging a dead horse at the bottom of a barrel. “Obviously we wouldn’t just let any three year old through. They have to be mentally up for it and talented enough, and also fully toilet trained.”

“It’s not exploitation. We have said no. There was one band of three year olds and they were good,” Cowell recalled. “But I knew that if they came back in a year they’d be so much better. And also closer to being legal and all that lovely lucrative tabloid coverage.”

When asked if he thought being plunged into the high pressure and exposed world of the X-Factor at such a young age would be damaging to a child’s development Cowell was quick to give reassurance.

“Not at all,” he said with a smile. “Any three year old who does well in the X-Factor will grow up to be just as normal as Cheryl and me.”

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