Chilcot Inquiry whitewash: No truth please, we’re British

George W. Bush, Tony Blair

The world’s worst Morecambe & Wise tribute act takes to the stage

There was widespread relief last night when it was revealed that the Chilcot Inquiry won’t include any details of Tony Blair and George Bush’s conversations, letters, and notes from the period of build-up to the Iraq war.

“I’m delighted,” said villager Nick Stalling of Harold’s Bravo Company, Royal Dunstable Regiment Rifle Platoon TA. “I served two tours out there with the Rifles. Placing it in some sort of context and allowing grieving families to know the truth about why their loved ones died would only cheapen the whole thing.”

“It was Tony Blair I was worried about,” Rev. Tansy Forster told us. “If we saw what he’d said and written there was a chance he could’ve come out of it badly, the poor man. At least now he’s free to call himself a peacemaker and make millions with his excellent reputation intact. I’ll be able to sleep easier at night knowing that.”

“Yeah, this is brilliant,” said nurse Ærndís Vigfusson. “After five years the official report still isn’t out but we know now it makes Blair and Bush untouchable. It’s good that those at the top can do whatever they like without consequence. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Mrs Vigfusson also said that she was pleased by the silence from the government and from Ed Miliband. “A different sort of politician would stand up and shout at the top of their voices that this is wrong, that Bush and Blair should be held accountable, and that the findings of the Chilcot Inquiry be made fully public and transparent. Luckily they are all equally self-serving and that’ll never happen.”

“I’m glad nothing ever changes, aren’t you?”


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2 Responses to Chilcot Inquiry whitewash: No truth please, we’re British

  1. Why is every attempt and effort made to keep providing Blair and Bush with every way out and around everything except holding them accountable. It is a preposterous fraud that makes jokes out of both the United States and Great Britain. It is time to quit the denial thinking that the secret is being hidden, when all the while everyone already knows or suspects. The only way that will bring a way to recover is to admit the state and condition you are in and make amends to all those whom you have harmed, but first rigorous honesty is demanded. Allowing the sick to become sicker through becoming codependant and enabling is killing us also. Visit for more truth.