Ancient cave painting thought to be first example of MP’s expense claim


Fifteen years of research on cave paintings in Harold Gorge has come to the conclusion the markings are an early example of a cave-man parliamentarian’s expenses claim.

“The first few items indicated these drawings may have been a way for a cave-man to document the time he lived in” local historian, Sam Tully explained. “We are used to seeing images of predators and family.

“But we really got confused by the pictures of a chauffeur driven walrus and cart, badger fur rug, and detailed drawing of a moat being cleaned.”

There was also evidence of depictions of a second cave allowance. In these expense claims there are about 12 pictures of second caves each crossed out and replaced by the next.

Archaeologists believe this to be the first example of the ancient tradition of ‘flipping’, the practice of changing your designated second cave to claim additional benefits and avoid capital gains tax.

“What was really impressive was the nature of this early example of fiddling” Ms Tully continued. “The painting shows claims for staplers, post-it notes and a tin opener, even though they hadn’t been invented.

“What was most intriguing though was the sad face at the end. We think this may be his way of saying ‘I’m sorry. It’s not against the rules but against the spirit of the rules’, a theory backed up but the image of crossed fingers.”

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