Tag Archives: jeff bezos

‘We’re boycotting Amazon’ is the new ‘We don’t have a TV’

smug2

Just because someone’s right it doesn’t mean they’re not also terribly annoying

Boycotting Amazon has officially become the new bullseye on the middle class morality dartboard finally ousting claiming not to have a TV.

“It’s taken years,” media and trend analyst Lizzie Philips told us. “But at long last not shopping with Amazon has become the single greatest source of conversational smugness.” Continue reading

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Tesco “giant catapult” delivery system will rival Amazon drones

tesco flinger

Device can also be used to destroy local businesses.

Tesco have responded to Amazon’s announcement that they are looking to use unmanned drones to make deliveries by revealing their own new delivery system, a series of giant catapults.

“Amazon’s plans to use unmanned drones need so much to fall their way that this is clearly just a publicity stunt.” said Philip Clarke, CEO of Tesco plc, “They are targeting 2018 for their ‘drone deliveries’ but for that to happen not only do they need significant changes in legislation, they also need huge progress in the technology involved. The technology behind our giant catapult system has been around for centuries, and as far as I know there are no laws against launching groceries through the air.” Continue reading

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