Harold’s very own magician and illusionist Cliff Platt has finally emerged from his latest David Blaine-style feat of endurance, having spent the last 79 days in a closet.
Cliff exited his self imposed incarceration to loud applause from his publicist, looking gaunt, weary, and smelling of his own faeces.
With no access to food, water or toilet facilities, sceptics had given Cliff no chance of success. However it wasn’t the sceptics that bothered Cliff, as he revealed in an exclusive interview. “I expected some doubters, but it was the social media haters that really surprised me. I remained active on twitter throughout my ordeal, and was shocked at the level of bigoted claustrophobia.”
Unsure yet of his next big illusion, Cliff plans to spend the summer recuperating and playing his favourite sport of cricket. Although Cliff doesn’t represent Harold, but rather opens the batting for their fiercest rivals, Dunstable.
The closet is no longer fit for its primary purpose, but has been donated to Harold’s incinerator where it will be recycled into useful CO2 gas.