Tag Archives: safety

by | February 23, 2014 · 2:00 pm

“That’s enough experiments to show kids how fast a photo can go round the Internet, now,” says Internet.

Teachers now resorting to extreme methods to show kids how dangerous internet is

Teachers now resorting to extreme methods to show kids how dangerous internet is

The Internet’s patience wore dangerously thin last night as yet another picture of an American 9th grade teacher holding up a sign was wearily shared on social media.

The exercise, supposed to warn teens of the potential risks of posting information and images online, has quickly become a tedious cliché and the Internet warned yesterday that we are close to the snapping point of its benevolence towards well-meaning junior high school teachers.

“OK, the first couple of times it was a fresh way to engage kids, and we all wanted to help them out – I’m sure the share and like numbers were very impressive,” commented a visibly annoyed Internet, “but I swear to god if I see one more of these bullshit copy-cat requests, I’m going to write a bunch of sarcastic comments or do a parody meme with cats. I haven’t thought it through yet, but it will be pithy and cynical,” the Internet added.

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by | November 19, 2013 · 7:00 am

Road safety group urges commuters to ‘cycle to work inside a bus’

bikebus

Cycling inside a bus ‘even safer than stabilisers’

In response to a shocking rise in accidents involving bicycles, a road safety group is urging commuters to do their cycling ‘inside a bus’.

“Cycling is undoubtedly the best way to get to work”, claimed Polly Harvey of campaign group ‘Two Wheels Good’. “There’s no other way of arriving all sweaty and self-righteous, and with your genitalia accentuated in lycra.”

Harvey insists that with a few simple modifications cyclists will not only be able to clutter up bus lanes, but also buses. “With a bit of effort, a half-decent bike can be lugged up to the top deck. Once there you can pedal up and down the aisle, making commuting safer for nearly everyone.”
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