Donkey community in uproar over Mhairi Black’s allegation that they bray like MPs

Prances McHoof: spokesdonkey

Newly elected SNP MP, Mhairi Black, has caused outrage amongst the UK’s donkeys by claiming that they make the same sound as MPs.

In an interview with the Times she commented on Parliament’s rules by saying: “So you’re not allowed to clap like an ordinary person, but you’re allowed to bray like a donkey? I mean, see PMQs, especially the Conservative side, they’ve got this weird noise they do. It actually sounds like a drunken mob.”

“This is an extremely serious allegation,” said spokesdonkey for the donkey community, Prances McHoof. “We bray to communicate our joys and fears, it’s the soundtrack of our lives. MP braying, especially that of the Tory front bench, is the soundtrack of boorish public school tossers who don’t know how to behave.”

“That Mhairi Black fails to draw a distinction between the two types of braying and tars us donkeys with her foul ‘just like MPs’ brush is a massive injustice and one that we demand she apologise for immediately. And if she wishes to indulge in animal imagery then may I suggest she likens the government to chimpanzees? Chimps frequently get pissed and act with boundless cruelty and self-interest too.”