10 car facts about Top Gear presenter Chris Evans


Evans also enjoys playing golf. F**king golf.


  • Chris Evans owns dozens of Ferraris, but he painted them white because red ones clash with his hair.
  • Chris Evans has had it written into his contract that no star will be allowed to beat his lap time in a reasonably priced car, because he owns dozens of Ferraris.
  • Owning dozens of Ferraris means that Chris Evans knows lots about cars, and it doesn’t make him an obvious wanker.
  • Chris Evans does a lot of work for charity with his dozens of Ferraris, but doesn’t like to talk about it.
  • Noel Edmonds once presented Top Gear. Noel Fucking Edmonds. He doesn’t even own dozens of Ferraris.
  • Chris Evans once bought the most expensive car at auction, a Ferrari. He no longer remembers which one it is.
  • Chris Evans impressed the BBC with his in-depth car knowledge. For instance, he can remember how much he paid for each of his dozens of Ferraris.
  • Evans hasn’t grafted for years writing reviews of workaday cars for local newspapers, or founded a motoring press agency. But he makes up for this lack of experience with dozens of Ferraris.
  • Quentin Wilson thinks Chris Evans will be perfect for Top Gear, but his opinion is worthless because he doesn’t own dozens of Ferraris.
  • Evans will have security protection on set to avoid being hit by producers because he owns dozens of Ferraris.

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