Ed Miliband is to set out Labour’s plans to cut university tuition fees, funded by a sponsored fun run around the area of Westminster.
Universities UK has warned that limiting the fees to £6,000 per year, instead of the current £9,000, would leave a £10bn funding gap. Mr Miliband, however, is confident that he can raise this figure by asking people to sponsor him to run 5 miles around the streets of Westminster, while dressed as an idiot with a severely limited grasp of economics.
“We looked at various options to raise the money but they were all either unpopular or impractical.” said the Labour leader, “Then Ed Balls and I sat down together, used all of our financial acumen and knowledge of the economy, and came up with this fun run idea. It’s honestly the best we’ve got.”
Miliband has set up a Justgiving page and has already raised £20 in sponsorship towards his £10bn target, from his wife. Ed Balls has so far refused to take part, apparently put off by the word “run”, but his alternative suggestion of a sponsored bacon sandwich eating contest was immediately vetoed by Miliband.
Members and supporters of the Labour party have suggested that they may be better served if their leader changed the event to a sponsored silence and just shut up until after the general election.