Death to footballers and cartoons! Isis launch their own sticker album

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For some reason she’s got a whole page to herself in it

Following on from the recent launch of their own currency Isis has taken another commerce-focussed break from dragging the world back to the 12th century and leaving it there. Briefly embracing modern life once more they’ve released Isis sticker packs and an album to put them in.

“All sticker albums apart from ours are un-Islamic,” said an Isis spokesman. “We are changing the tyrannical sticker system that enslaves Muslims with its images of footballers or scenes from Frozen.”

The British government has been quick to say that although swapsies is an integral part of collecting stickers they will not swap stickers for hostages.

“We don’t negotiate with terrorists in any way,” said David Cameron. “Unless we get a pack with a foil Bin Laden in it then we can have what we want.”

Isis stickers will be on sale in the UK from tomorrow rendering Justin Bieber stickers merely the second most evil money can buy.

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