There was celebration in Harold as a woman discovered what the flaps on the ends of kitchen foil boxes are for and used a roll of foil correctly for the very first time.
“I’d always used it the way God intended,” said Sally Lloyd owner of Sally’z Cut’z hair and beauty salon. “You open the box, tug on it a bit, then struggle to get the serrated edge to work and nine times out of ten the whole roll falls out at that point so you have a little but heartfelt swear and try again.”
However Sally’s life was changed when she realised that on both ends of the box there are little flaps to push in and ‘lock’ the roll so it’s easy to pull off the exact amount you need then close the box and rip the desired foil precisely on the sharpened edge.
“I haven’t been this surprised since I found out Elton John was gay,” a shocked but jubilant Sally told us. “And then when I looked at the cling film the flaps were on that box too. My life has been changed.”
Sadly it all got to much for Sally when a well-wisher then showed her how to peel a banana correctly by opening it at the ‘other end’ and using the stalk as a handle while she ate it.
Mind blown she had to leave the party early and go and have a lie down. She was later revived by a bowl of hearty soup from a can that had been opened using a brick and heated up over a tuna can flame. Once she was feeling better Sally said that her new skills would be a great help not just in her day-to-day existence but she also felt twenty per cent more confident of surviving a zombie apocalypse or a day trip to Merthyr.