Happy birthday Samaritans. Five million calls answered a year and no one ever gets put on hold. Whatever you’re doing we wish you could train the call centre at our bank to do it too.
Today’s Weather: Hazy
Harold Tweets…My Tweets
- Japanese boy overjoyed Boris is recovering “I’ve trained for 1583 days and I want my revenge”
- Huge increase in coronavirus testing as the Wombles take power
- Delivery van driver now graduate only profession as middle class realise its importance
- Forget Joe Wicks: Michael Gove’s 5PM spin class is nation’s favourite workout
- World wide wahey: delighted animals tell humans to stay on lockdown forever
- UK to give world a bloody good laugh by getting morons to panic buy McDonald’s
- Anti-vaxxers devastated there is no coronavirus vaccine they can refuse to take
- January: still no end in sight.
What they’re saying about the Evening Harold!
"Way better than the Guardian" - Jeremy Corbyn
"Ha - this piece of wit contains a lot of truth" - Brian May.
THE REAL BRIAN MAY!!!
"I just love this paper.... site... web thingy. Makes my day, every day" - Phil Burfoot
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Enjoy some older Haroldy goodness