Heseltine criticised the witch for buying an American broom.
With confirmation that Baroness Thatcher’s ‘Halloween Fly-By’ route will pass directly over Harold on Tuesday, local astronomers have every chance of an excellent view of the comet-like phenomenon.
The former PM’s icy skeleton said she’s ‘really looking forward to dusting off the old broomstick and heading up North to scare the living daylights out of Arthur Scargill.’
She is due to depart Gatwick Airport at 1900 hours, regardless of the weather, flying directly over Harold before arriving in the Barnsley area around midnight. A defiant Scargill tweeted ‘Ooh, see me quaking in me pit boots, pet.’
Scargill remained silent most of the day, finally emerging with a brief statement in the gusting wind on the steps outside his crumbling gothic manor house in West Yorks. ‘You don’t scare me, you old bag of bones,’ he shouted at the dark, thundery sky while brandishing his rusty pickaxe, Excalibur.
‘I’m not superstitious, it’s a trick, nobody comes back from the dead, not even you…’ only breaking off when a welcome delivery moped came up the gravel drive. ‘One stake and garlic order for a Mr Scargill,’ said the boy, ‘and your free crucifix, God help you, sir.’
Meanwhile, back in Harold, Tesco Express manager Paul Watts said the fly-by was ‘a wonderful opportunity for local families to get out and do a bit of star-gazing,’ adding that they have a good range of astronomy equipment in store.
‘They are just plastic toys really,’ he said, ‘brightly-coloured binoculars and telescopes already on the shelves for Christmas stocking fillers, but if I can shift some of them for Halloween at a tenner a go, well, every little helps. It’s what the Baroness would have wanted.’
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