Following the relative success of Ukip in the English council election, and their expected results in the European ballot, many right-minded people are now having to backtrack from their pre-election smears.
With casual racism being proven an accepted political position, and the fact you are statistically never more than 15 feet from a Ukip voter, people across the country are now saying “how can I hate racists, some of my best friends are racists”.
“I’m no racist – some of my best friends are darkies” explained Gavin
A controversial new ‘Token Friends’ website has been launched to enable people to obtain a black or gay ‘friend’ and therefore be immune to any criticism that their racist or homophobic views are indeed racist or homophobic.
Token Friends founder Jenny May of Harold explained the website’s appeal:
“The sort of people who traditionally relied on the ‘some of my best friends are black / gay’ line to explain away their seemingly racist or homophobic rants now no longer have any black or gay friends left for some reason. Our website allows them to obtain that invaluable friend so they can continue explaining their ‘point of view’ down at the pub and in the online comments section of the Daily Mail.”