Ed Miliband has become the latest in a long line of Labour ‘big guns’ to criticise the way the party is being led. The party leader had barely finished his pre-conference speech before former cabinet minister Miliband launched a blistering attack.
“He didn’t even sound as if HE believed what he was saying. Don’t ask me what he LOOKED like – I had my eyes shut at the time, to try and make him seem more real, but it certainly didn’t convince me! The thing is,” he went on “the self-same numpties who drove the economic bus off the cliff road just a few years back are still at the bloody wheel.”
Labour is encouraging its MPs and activists to focus on the voters’ financial experiences under the coalition government and this enrages the straightforward 43 year old Doncaster MP. “Look, it’s all very well complaining that standards of living have fallen” he explains “but that’s what happens when you’ve spent all your money, your pockets are inside-out, the car’s been repossessed and the banks have shredded your credit cards. These idiots seem to think you can cut back on your spending and still spend the same amount.”
“I never did trust my brother David. He was always a shifty sod with no real substance, that’s why I stood against him in the leadership election. Unfortunately, in the end, I suppose it was his ‘more charismatic personality’ that won the day but I’m not surprised he’s making a complete mess of it. I’m sorry, you say he didn’t win? Well, who did then?”