Tag Archives: Valentine’s Day

Straight men suddenly feminist, anti-capitalists as they contemplate panic-buying Valentine’s gifts

CaptureA startling political transformation is sweeping through the UK’s straight men this morning as they contemplate going into town and throwing themselves at shops selling cards, flowers and bath bombs with all the urgency and judgement of a pack of coked-up wolves.

“Why should I have to do this?” asked villager Nick Stalling. “If feminism means we’re equal then why isn’t my girlfriend buying me a load of red and pink rubbish too? In fact why should either of us spend money on stuff or a meal out? This is no way to live. We should both stick it to The Man and ignore this objectifying capitalist shite!” Continue reading

Comments Off on Straight men suddenly feminist, anti-capitalists as they contemplate panic-buying Valentine’s gifts

Filed under Valentine's Day

Man blames ‘faulty’ service station flowers for Valentine’s Day sex failure

flowersA 57 year old Harold man has gone to social media to highlight how his Valentine’s Day was ruined because of faulty flowers and chocolates purchased from the local Shell Station.

Local councillor Ron Ronsson says the flowers and chocolates seemed ok when he purchased them on the way home from the pub at 11pm on Valentine’s Day. But they deteriorated so badly on the 15 minute walk home that by the time he handed them to his wife, she threw them straight back in his face.
Continue reading

Comments Off on Man blames ‘faulty’ service station flowers for Valentine’s Day sex failure

Filed under Around Harold, Culture, Dating, Lifestyle, Sex