It’s quite sad, really
Village Goth Josh Fenning has welcomed plans by the police to start recording the many, many crimes committed against him.
Fenning claims to be the victim of a sustained campaign by ‘shadowy elements’ in Harold, including ‘the mood in the pub’, his broadband provider and ‘whoever keeps leaving him milk’.
“Barely a day goes by when Fenning doesn’t come and report some perceived crime against him”, said PC Anita Flegg. “I suppose officially, I ought to start writing them down.”
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