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Yorkshire cycling fan admits doping black puddings


Fast food?

A butcher in Leeds has released a high perfomance blood sausage to celebrate the Tour de France coming to Yorkshire.

On the outside, the pud looks like any other in his shop, but it contains around 15% more blood.

“Using a technique I developed after reading Lance Armstrong’s book, I extracted a good sized cupful of blood from each of these beauties”, explained Derek Arkwright.

“This I stored in a secret fridge away from council inspectors, while the puddings recuperated behind the sneeze guard. To see them nestling there, next to the strips of decorative fake grass…you’d never know they were destined for greatness.”
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