Category Archives: Brexit

Lord Vetinari takes control of the UK

Lord_Vetinari

At last a leader with convictions, intelligence and razor-sharp cheekbones

The UK is under new leadership this morning following a coup by the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork, Lord Havelock Vetinari.

“Coup is a needlessly dramatic word,” Lord Vetinari told reporters. “I can hardly be said to have violently thrown a government from power when you don’t have one, or an Opposition. Both sides seem entirely preoccupied with what one might call ‘internal matters’. Indeed barely anyone noticed as I walked into Number Ten and installed myself in the best office and Drumknott in an suitable alcove nearby. The only person to do more than raise an eyebrow was Theresa May who I must say kicks like a mule and has a command of the baser aspects of the English language that is entirely formidable.” Continue reading

2 Comments

Filed under Brexit, Politics

Larry the cat will be in place as Prime Minister in days, Cameron confirms

_89191210_larry1reuters

We think he’ll do a purrfect job. Purrfect, get it? Purrfect. Please yourselves.

Speaking to a packed House of Commons David Cameron has confirmed that in order to provide the nation with leadership and stability Larry the cat, currently in post as Downing Street’s top mouser, will be Prime Minister very soon.

“This country is divided and facing economic armageddon,” Cameron said from the dispatch box. “I don’t know why everyone’s pointing and jeering as if that’s somehow my fault. Anyway, we need a strong leader and Larry is by some margin the most capable and popular member of this government. Plus no one knows who his dad is so there’s no Panama-style revelations lurking in any closets there.” Continue reading

Comments Off on Larry the cat will be in place as Prime Minister in days, Cameron confirms

Filed under Brexit