Don’t blame me, I’m not in charge of Jack shit
The BMA has unexpectedly agreed to GP surgeries opening 84 hours a week – just as soon as MPs do the same.
“We were against it, when the PM first raised the idea.” said a BMA spokeswoman “But then we thought, sod it, if the MPs can open theirs 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, we’d go for it too. We were straight on the phone to Jeremy Hunt to let him know.”
“I say Jeremy Hunt; we heard he’d gone home for the weekend, so we left a message for him at the DoH. I say message; they were shut, so we left a voicemail. We haven’t heard back but they can’t be closed for the weekend, because they gave no locum number on the answephone.”
The Evening Harold located the Health Secretary at a restaurant in his constituency yesterday. In between courses six and seven Mr Hunt said “They must be mad. MPs already work almost two days in seven at Westminster, including one in four Fridays; mornings only, obviously.”
“Even an idiot knows the best way to manage a demoralised workforce is to scapegoat them for your own cock-ups, then make them work longer hours to make up for unfilled vacancies. What’s wrong with that?”
“Would you like to buy some marmalade? No? Oh well.”
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