Teachers delighted to have third minister in two years

Justine Greening. Or is it Liz Truss? Who wrote ‘Eats, Shoots and Leaves’?

School staff are overjoyed to have a new Education Secretary, after the old one hung around for almost two whole years.

“Don’t get me wrong” said Harold teaching assistant Carly Jeffery “Nicky Morgan was great at first. But she sort-of ran out of steam. We’d sometimes go weeks without a new plan to combat left-wing teacher-training of the 1970’s.”

Ms Jeffery hopes new Education Secretary, Justine Greening will have plenty of new ideas for the autumn term . “I hope they include a call to return to ‘traditional education’. Kids rote learning times tables and not acquiring life skills always gives us a good laugh.”

“Funny thing though,” mused Jeffery “none of our teachers were born in the 1970’s and anyway they all vote Conservative, they must do. Most nights when they’re struggling through a pile of paperwork at least one of them will suggest sticking their pen somewhere up the Education Secretary – that sounds pretty right wing to me. Still, the Daily Mail is always on about it and they’re never wrong about schools. Hmm … do you suppose Paul Dacre knows Greening is gay?”