EastEnders fans shocked at controversial farming storyline

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Impressive attention to detail

EastEnders fans were in shock today after a controversial storyline involving arable farming and animal husbandry came to a shattering conclusion involving dairy cattle and chemical fertilisers.

Viewers have watched in recent weeks enthralled by the programme’s gradual spiral into the world of agriculture, but few predicted how deep into a realistic depiction of farming practices the series would go.

Sunday night’s omnibus edition featured what is believed to be the first examination of bovine artificial insemination ever seen on the programme, and raised more than £80,000 for the harvest festival.

Some viewers were less enthusiastic about the new direction, however.

“If I’d wanted to learn about bloody crop rotation I’d have put on the Archers,” insisted Evening Harold media correspondent Piers Waghorn. “Drugs, violence, sex – that’s what we want, not sodding bull semen. I can get that at home.”

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