A new picture of the dog wearing trousers made out of material from “the dress” has caused the internet to grind to a halt, as families fight bitterly and former friends stand divided over whether the dog would wear blue and black or white and gold.
“Society seems to have fallen into three distinct camps,” explained Evening Harold culture correspondent Piers Waghorn.
“Some people see the dog wearing blue and black, some see it wearing white and gold, and others see a bunch of wankers obsessing over a picture of a dog while our world slides rapidly down the toilet.”
With the internet’s undersea transcontinental cables melting under the unprecedented load, the world’s economy has ground to a halt, bringing the rise of anarchy and the destruction of everything we hold good about society.
Most large cities are now at a standstill, as violent gangs dressed in blue or gold fight pitched battles in the great pant colour riots. Many citizens have retired to rough cave dwellings, where they scratch the dog picture on the dirt wall and gaze in awe, forever unable to answer the great question:
“Surely they’re trousers, not pants?”