Kate Moss was yesterday escorted off an easyJet flight from Bodrum to Luton by police on the grounds that she had “no business travelling like a poor.”
Bedfordshire Police confirmed in a statement that Moss, whose wealth is estimated at around fifty-five million pounds, had been taken off the flight and provisionally cautioned under the 2005 It Just Winds People Up When You Slum It Act which is aimed at keeping the insanely wealthy out of spaces normally occupied by the mostly skint.
“A lot of of us can only dream of being rich enough to travel first class or by private jet,” the statement said. “And when those that are refuse to do so it upsets everyone’s mental balance and is quite rightly considered an offence.”
Meanwhile detectives in France are interviewing Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie following their taking an economy flight with their six children, but without an entourage, from Paris to Nice and carrying their luggage themselves. They are expected to be charged with aggravated not acting like the fantasy figures we’ve all made them into, and for being stupid enough to believe that dark glasses and a hipster hat are an effective disguise.
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