Millions prepare to miss work, telling boss they’re ‘stranded’ by 1mm of snow

Millions of workers across the UK are getting prepared to phone up their boss on Monday and declare themselves ‘stranded’ by the 1mm of snowfall on their drive.

The flurry of the white stuff fell on Friday night, but some are hoping it will stay on the ground long enough to justify an extra week off work.

“As soon as that first flake landed on the ground I knew that would be the perfect excuse not to go in,” Luke Sallent, a skiing instructor from Harold, told us.

“The risk of slipping on the snow is just to dangerous. It may have melted almost instantly but it is still present in water form so I’m not taking any chances”.

It’s not just workers who are grasping whatever little snow they have had to take the week leading up to New Year off.

Network Rail say they are having to run a reduced service. They say that a severe lack of leaves on the line meant excuses available for poor service have reached an all time low. Although the majority of the network has seen no snow whatsoever, they are cancelling all services out of Kings Cross ‘just in case’.

With snow expected to reach Harold sometime between now and 2018, PC Flegg has asked residents panic buy as much bread and milk as possible, just to be on the safe side.

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