Overcooked turkey and rock-hard Christmas cake was still making its way through the nation’s alimentary canals when the first of many unwanted Christmas arguments was put for sale on eBay with a £1 reserve.
Many consider it not in the Christmas spirit to sell off Christmas arguments that family members have sometimes spent decades lovingly crafting, but eBay UK manager Mike Smith said it was simply a matter of supply and demand.
“Some families have a wife that always massacres the turkey, a short-tempered alcoholic husband, lazy kids with a sense of entitlement, and senile grandparents. Of course they will have amazing arguments on Christmas Day but other families aren’t so lucky” said Smith.
“Why shouldn’t a well-adjusted family be able to pop onto the internet and spend £10 on a classic ‘it was better in my day’ rant complete with spittle, or £50 on a passive-aggressive ‘compliment’ about how the hostess appears to have lost weight.”
Harold café owner Dominic Delaney had no regrets about selling off 10 unwanted Christmas arguments, and said he wished he had done it years ago.
“We got £150 all up, which is a tidy sum in anyone’s language. My wife Pippa and I thought we’d spend the money buying up some unwanted Christmas presents on eBay. We had an absolutely massive argument deciding what to buy and we sold that for another £100.”