Will we cope without them? Yes.
ITV has confirmed that it will stop broadcasting after tens of thousands of people signed an online petition calling for it to do so on the grounds that its output is damaging the nation’s IQ.
Adam Crozier, ITV’s chief executive said: “The content of our programs is carefully considered however on closer examination it was determined that we broadcast a ceaseless torrent of vacuous bobbins and that the best thing to do was to simply shut up shop and pretend that it never happened.”
While Simon Cowell will continue his global dominance other ITV stars will not fare so well outside of the channel’s sweaty embrace. Fears are already growing for the cast of TOWIE who have been released back into the wild despite concerns that they have no survival skills while Vernon Kay has been seen in his local B&Q applying to be a shelf.
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