The 2014 Tour de France is apparently still going on, despite all the riders having left England two weeks ago.
This year’s race began in Leeds on July 5th and the move to Britain proved a great success, with an estimated 2.5 million spectators lining the route over the opening weekend in order to look at the foreigners in funny clothes. After covering over two hundred miles around Yorkshire the competitors headed for London, before crossing to France the following day, at which point everybody lost interest.
When the riders left the UK Mark Cavendish was already eliminated due to injury, with Chris Froome soon to follow. Once the only British riders anybody had heard of were no longer involved UK media coverage essentially stopped, but reports suggest that the race is still going on today and will not actually finish for another week.
“I’m not one hundred percent certain, because my French isn’t perfect, but I just got back from a short break in Marseilles and I’m sure that while I was there French TV seemed to be covering the race as if it was still going on.” explained Steve Johnstone, a sports reporter for the Telegraph, who first unearthed the news.
“I was supportive of ‘Le Tour’ coming to the UK because I was told that it was an historic event, but after they left Yorkshire I just went back to watching the World Cup like everybody else. It all went a bit quiet after they headed for London, so I assumed they’d all been run over by buses or something. I never suspected that they had been riding around France for two weeks.”
“Apparently they are trying to get to Paris but by the sounds of things they’re taking a bit of a roundabout route. Somebody should take pity on the poor lads and give them a sat nav. Or at least point them in the right direction.”