Murray unsure whether to ‘win Wimbledon for Britain’ before Scottish independence vote

Murray may compromise by finishing second

Britain’s Scottish tennis star Andy Murray has revealed that he’s torn over whether to win Wimbledon just yet.

Hero Murray, who last year won an Olympic gold for a country, explained that winning Wimbledon was a ‘difficult decision’ that shouldn’t be taken too lightly.

“There’s a lot of emotion around this, and I don’t want to be hasty”, said Murray. “If I do decide to win, it should be for economic reasons.” But Scottish hardliners have accused him of sitting on the fence, or whatever it is ‘Sassenachs use down there in the middle of the court’.

David Cameron has come out in favour of a win, although he denied this could be England’s last chance of basking in somewhere else’s glory.

“The win is by no means assured, but a ‘no’ vote won’t be the end of the world”, he explained. “We can always wheel out Tim Henman again.”

Westminster is hopeful that with nearly a week to go until the tournament, a compromise can be reached that makes Britain look Great.

“If it kicks off at the G8 meeting, we’ll be able to shut down Britain’s air space and then none of the good players will be able to make it in. That should ensure the result that England has been patiently waiting for”, soothed the PM.

Before adding, “come on Tim!”