Tag Archives: Social care

‘Oy! Stop clogging up our corridors! Jeremy Hunt tells selfish dying patients

“Social care? No, not a clue, do tell.”

Jeremy Hunt has called on the dying and their nearest and dearest to ‘play fair’ and stop calling ambulances in the last hours of their lives.

“We only get a finite amount of life,” said Health and Social Care (no really) Secretary Jeremy Hunt “so it does no good if those who’ve already had their three score and ten – make that three score if you’re poor – insist on clogging up hospital corridors.”

“Wide corridors, I might add, which might otherwise be leased to Costa Coffee or Pret a Manger. Or maybe something novel, say a vintage marmalade Continue reading

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Jeremy Hunt on his decision to stay: “I haven’t fully buggered up the NHS yet.”

“I haven’t fully buggered up the NHS yet”

Offered a move to the business department yesterday, Jeremy Hunt convinced the PM that though the NHS is on its knees, it still needs at least one more big push before complete privatisation is guaranteed.

Mrs May accepted that Hunt was doing a cracking job of buggering up the health service but was worried some sick and disabled people might survive, so she’s Continue reading

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