On the 400th anniversary of William Shakespeare’s death, the country is grimly preparing for the inevitable bout of having to pretend they have understood, liked or read any of his plays.
Shakespeare is widely regarded as the greatest writer in the English language, and most people are perfectly happy to accept this fact without having to prove it for themselves.
Every hundred years, unfortunately, the anniversary of the bard’s death comes around, forcing the population to endure an endless barrage of dramatic culture, just when Game of Thrones is starting back up again.
Among the wall-to-wall culture, a live extravaganza is planned from the Royal Shakespeare Theatre, featuring the likes of David Tennant, Judi Dench and Bill Oddie.
Fluctuations in Fry’s weight in gold has been blamed on national treasure investors
Days after Chief Secretary to the Treasury, Danny Alexander, told the House of Commons that the government will be selling off £15 billion worth of public assets now that their policies have done to the economy what the volcano did to Pompeii, the Great British Fire Sale began in earnest with bidding being opened on Stephen Fry.
“Assets aren’t just companies and institutions though God knows we’re flogging off enough of them: the Student Loan Company, Royal Mail, the NHS it’s all got to go,” explained a treasury insider. “The great wealth of a nation lies in its people. So they can jolly well be priced, packaged and sold off too. Simples.” Continue reading