Jeremy Hunt still not sacked: country suspects he has ‘photos’ of Theresa May

‘What’s my name? No, don’t tell me, I think I’ve got this one.’

As the hapless Health Secretary remains in post after yet another disastrous set of NHS stats, even Daily Mail readers are starting to suspect that he has some incriminating photos of Theresa May tucked away somewhere safe. Somewhere he’s never, ever been seen.

“Our best bet is that they’re hidden in a storeroom with a ‘How to make the NHS work better’ sign on the door.” Said Harold GP Dr Clive Evans “In a filing cabinet marked ‘Staff’, stowed inside training notes from a seminar on ‘Motivational Management: how to build a motivated staff team’. That’s where I’d hide all my dodgy photos. If I had any, which I don’t.”

Political commentators are sceptical of such a reason, pointing out that whilst it would explain a congenital idiot being left in charge of the UK’s single greatest achievement of the last seventy years, it would leave unanswered questions such as – ‘David Davis?’

 

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