Fans of Andy Murray’s new wife, Kim, breathed a collective grunt of relief at the news that the BBC has secured the terrestrial TV rights to show the players’ girlfriends, relatives and assorted celebrities whilst they are watching the tennis at Wimbledon.
Acclaiming the news as a major coup, Barbara Slater, BBC Sport Director, said “Whilst we are obviously disappointed that our bid of £15 and dinner with Claire Balding was considered insufficient to retain the rights to cover the tennis itself, we are delighted to be able to continue the coverage of the tennis players’ sweethearts and pushy mothers. Most viewers will hardly notice the difference.”
According to an insider, the BBC believe they are “right on trend” with their new coverage which they hope will follow the success of programmes like Gogglebox which shows people watching television programmes rather than the programmes themselves.
“We think this will be a smash,” she told us, “You will be able to see drama, anxiety and delight on the faces of the glamourous spectators without having to watch all of that boring tennis.”
“We are deploying even more cameras than usual and we may extend coverage to include ordinary members of the public if they are fit and middle class enough.”
A highlights programme, titled Spectatorwatch, will be shown every evening presented by Michaela Strachan. Although programme producers promise plenty of rare celebrity sightings, they are unable to confirm if Sir Cliff Richard will appear. “The good news is that if Sir Cliff does show up we won’t be showing him singing during rain breaks,” said a spokesman, “because we don’t have the rights to that.”